Pregnancy is an insane journey, each week brings a new feeling, symptom, question, joy, adventure… One of the most interesting aspects of pregnancy is how the world around me has reacted…. and commented…. Some of it good, some of it not so good.
So let’s start with the bad ones. Here are the worst 5 comments I’ve received since being pregnant:
1. You look like a beached whale.
The person that made this comment is likely to read this, and they will know it was them I’m now quoting. It’s ok though. I told them it wasn’t a cool thing to say then I got over it. And we’re still friends. xx
2. Are you sure there’s only one?
Seriously?? C’mon people. You NEVER say that to a pregnant woman. And guess what, it was a medical professional that said this to me. #fail
3. Look how big you’re getting!
Instead of ‘big’ try using words like ‘grown’. Eg, “Look how much you’ve grown!” It sort of sounds the same but less about the size of my belly and more about the progress of the baby.
4. This is going to be the longest pregnancy ever.
Again, the person who said this might be reading this. Being my first pregnancy, there’s been a lot to process, a lot of physical/emotional changes, if I share a few of my struggles with you, don’t make me feel like I’m being a burden. #kthanksbye
5. An entire conversation about my pregnancy only.
There is more to me than just my uterus. As well as growing a human my interests include: working three jobs at two places, volunteering at church, singing, traveling, and coffee.
Now onto the good stuff! Here are the top 5 comments I’ve had:
1. You’re all belly.
Meant as a compliment in that I look like I haven’t put on any weight anywhere else. Lovely!
2. You really do look stunning!
I guess that pregnancy glow has finally kicked in, eh?
3. You make pregnancy look easy.
Possibly my fave comment so far because it wasn’t about my appearance.
4. This is the most happy/at peace I’ve seen you.
It’s true. You’d think pregnancy would stress me, but it’s had the opposite effect. It’s put me in a place of complete surrender knowing that while I have responsibility here, I have little control over the future of this person that will soon call me “Mum”. Perspective is everything.
5. You’ve had such a stylish pregnancy.
This meant a lot to me because a) it came from a stylish friend that works in the fashion industry, and b) I struggled to find my pregnancy style at first and it’s hard to find good maternity clothes.
Above all, I know that 99% of people have good intentions and are never aware of when they say the wrong thing. I rarely get actually offended, but that’s just me. Others may be more sensitive. So let me encourage you, when talking to a pregnant woman:
1. Ask her about more than just the baby.
2. NEVER use the word ‘fat’. Even as a joke.
3. Say something NOT related to her appearance, and,
4. Remember every pregnancy is unique, there is no ‘standard size’.
JB xx
jessicabigg 