[Originally published 8th November 2012]

This time of year for me is an intense world of emails, meetings, phone calls and general running around. I often feel helpless when somebody asks me “is there anything I can do to help?” because from a certain point onwards you need to just do it yourself. Delegation is  great but it can be time consuming. Also, the need for help often comes up at the last minute meaning only those who are free at the time can step in – which in this time-poor world, won’t be many people.

Having thought about it some more I believe there is a lot you can do for your leaders, not just when they’re busy, and it isn’t necessarily about taking the task off their hands. (Although that is amazing when that happens.) So here’s some thoughts I’ve come up with on loving your leaders.

1. Be resourceful

These days there are lots of ways to share information. I use all sorts of platforms – our website, facebook (pages AND groups), email, newsletters, text messages, Dropbox, and of course, the good old fashioned face-to-face conversation. (Yes, people still do that.) On top of that I try to make sure I’m not the only person with the answers so if I’m unavailable there should be someone else who can help.

If you need some info from your leader, perhaps investigate a few other pathways first.

2. Keep it “between the nines”

I absolutely love how relational my work is. It is by far the most amazing thing to be in contact with so many awesome people. However, contrary to my ‘image’, I do have a life outside of my work and that needs to take priority too. So to keep my work/life balance on track, I don’t respond to work related calls/texts before 9am or after 9pm. I’ll be honest, I don’t appreciate my phone going off outside of these times. I need some headspace too from time to time. Pretty sure anyone in leadership does.

3. Facebook is personal, and not that efficient.

Everyone is on it, most of us love it, and it can be an incredible tool for communication. However, it’s still personal which can make it hard to manage ‘work talk’ when you’re only online cos you wanna see the photo your overseas friends just posted from their holiday. When contacting your leader, be cautious when you use facebook for this. With the amount of email traffic I get, I’ve developed a flagging system that helps me monitor my replies. I can’t do this in facebook which makes it difficult.

4. Know you’re leaders personality type.

I’m introverted. Yep, it’s true. Speaking publicly and leading large groups of people is a learned skilled (one that I love) but it drains me. Heaps. I don’t disappear after a large event because I’m being unsociable, I’m just exhausted and can’t function properly so I need to take some space. Knowing your leaders personality type will help you understand how and why they interact the way they do, preventing any confusion and potential hurt. This is important for community and sometimes takes some forgiveness. (Leaders get tired and stressed and don’t always say everything in the perfect and most pastoral way…)

5. Respect personal space.

I’ve alluded to this a bit already. As someone’s influence and responsibility grows, so does their need to protect their emotional well being. I believe it’s vital for leaders to spend adequate time with people they don’t lead. For me, this is expressed in the time I keep on Sundays for my fiance and family. I love making time for people when I can, but I find no shame in saying no because I know I need a break and fall asleep on mum and dad’s couch after family lunch.

6. Pay attention.

Repetition is frustrating. (There, I said it!) Listen. Ask questions. Take notes if you need to. Know what is desired of you to fulfill whatever your role is. A good leader will know how to support and serve you either way, but the journey is a lot more enjoyable (and fruitful) if you don’t have to backtrack over details.

Last little tip – offer some encouragement with every request. A little encouragement goes a long way. I love the emails I get that say thanks as well as ask me something. 🙂

I hope this has landed well — I’ve tried to be honest but nice about it. It’s not about any kind of separation between leaders and those they lead. It’s about recognising that we are all people with needs that when met, help us be the best versions of ourselves. I want to be the best leader I can be and if that means I have to ask you to not text me after 9pm, I’m ok about that.

Just saying.

J xo